Learning how to deal with terrible bosses

Having a terrible boss can be absolutely horrific! The feeling of having to deal with someone majority of your day who you do not like and who does not like you is absolutely annoying! Or even worse if you have a boss who acts nice and kind in your face but manipulates and schemes against you behind your back. I would much rather you be mean to in my face so it least I know what I am dealing with.  So why does this happen and what can you do about it? Well I have come to realize from my own experiences that bosses are people just like anyone else which mean they have issues just like anyone else and as a result their issues show up in their management. For example, if a person is having power struggle issues at home with their spouse and come to work making demands and throwing their power around than they are probably very insecure about their lack of authority and feel the need to over compensate for what they are unable to do at home. Sound familiar?? So since I have been through this a few times in my life, I have learned a thing or two on how to deal with bosses like this that I want to share with you.

1.     First and foremost always remember that you are an adult and do not deserve to be treated or talked to like a child. It is important to set boundaries (in a professional way of course). Have a conversation with your boss about how he or she speaks to you and or treats you.  If you need someone else in the room to have this conversation do not hesitate to ask for support either from HR or some else with authority.

2.      Document, but be careful how you document. Email is a wonderful tool however, you have to be mindful that once it’s in writing you cannot go back so you never want to put anything in writing that can come back to haunt you. Keep emails short and to the point. Anything else can be discussed in person or not at all. However, It is always good to keep a personal documentation log of what has been occurring. Be sure to list dates, times and people in the event you have to use it for legal purposes in the future.

3.     If you’re in Christ remember that you work for the Lord and your just there on assignment anyway. Seek guidance and instruction from God on what he may be trying to show or teach you and what your next move should be. And remember no weapon formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue that accuses you in judgment God will condemn. The bible says this is a benefit for being a child of the Most High God!

4.      Do not allow yourself to be abused or mistreated; go through the chain of command if needed to make sure you are being treated properly and fairly. Most times bosses treat people bad because they are trying to push them out or they really believe this is what bosses do. Yes, believe it or not there are people who really think that as a boss they are supposed to rule and dominate and everyone else is supposed to take it because they are the boss, “issues”!

5.     Maintain your professionalism and be polite but keep your distance especially if you have a job where you don't have to be in your bosses face all the time. Stay busy and stay away!

6.     Be mindful who you talk to about your boss and who sees you talking. Believe it or not, your boss has “minions” which means there is always someone who wants to be the teacher’s pet or A. want to stay out of the fire or B. want to get a promotion and this is the only way they think will guarantee it. So you have to know who you’re talking too and who they are talking too. It’s best practice not talk to anyone at work about your boss but we all know that is not realistic especially if multiple people feel the way that you do so just be careful.

7.      Depending on the intensity of your bosses negative attitude towards you, and if after conversations to try to resolve the issue there is still no resolve, you might need to think about if this is the place that you want to continue working at. Remember you always have options even if you think that you don't. It’s best to keep your eyes and ears open for other opportunities anyway especially if you’re young and just getting started in your career. For you old heads, maybe it’s time for you to get uncomfortable and move forward as well whether that means retirement or applying for a promotion. One thing I have learned is that life/ God has a funny way of getting our attention and “shaking up the nest”. If things are getting uncomfortable at work, than it may be time to DO SOMETHING ELSE! Embrace it!!

 

 

 

 

 

Gwendolyn Onuoha